Humour

From One to Two, From a Dog to a Zoo

About three weeks back, a good friend of mine asked me how it was going.

“How you coping with two kids? Hair gone grey yet? Do you know the expression from one to two, from a dog to a zoo?”

I’d never heard it before, but after just a week of being a dad of two little monkeys, with only 18 months apart, I knew exactly what he was going on about.

dog to zoo
“How long shall we give them before we start screaming for food?” “Let’s just get on with it.” Photo by Herls Tom

As a dog owner I can safely say that looking after a westie is no comparison to trying to manage two kids. Westies don’t interrupt your sleep, they don’t need burping at 5am after a bottle of milk, and when hungry they don’t scream as if you’ve just dipped their toe in a boiling cup of water.

I’ve been to a few zoos around the world, but I’ve never been drawn to the idea of feeding penguins for a living, running after giraffes in the evening to get them back in their tall houses, or having to clean out monkey cages. I guess it’s hard to compare my new life to one of a zoo keeper, but I reckon a zoo keeper probably has it quite easy. Continue reading “From One to Two, From a Dog to a Zoo”

Expat Issues, Great things about Spain, Humour

How life changes when you’re an Expat Dad

I’m not ashamed to admit that I was terrified about becoming a Dad. First it was the famous ‘sleepless nights’ syndrome. Like most blokes I get grumpy if I don’t have my beauty sleep. I used to have visions of waking up on the last line of the metro with a lovely dribble stain on my jacket, or even dozing off in class to allow my students to cover my face in red board marker.

Boy or girl
How can you buy clothes for someone you have never seen?

Having the responsibility of looking after a baby boy who can only communicate through crying was a definite worry too. My biggest concern questions were: how are you supposed to bath a slippery baby? What about getting it dressed? And how do you change a nappy without getting splashed with wee and poop?

After nearly five months of being a Dad I have to say that all those worries seem like a distant memory. Sure, the first two weeks were mental. Neither of us slept much, but the responsibility of looking after our son gave us extra energy. I soon got the hang of bathing and getting my son dressed and, as of yet, no poop has met my clothing, wee has, several times, but no poop. Continue reading “How life changes when you’re an Expat Dad”